Thoughts on Thursday {Understanding Emotion}

TOT

There are times in every marriage when someone gets mad or sad or whatever and the other person becomes defensive or dismissive. Instead why don’t we take a look at why that person is upset?

For example, last week I forgot to lock a door at our house before going to bed….not good. When Mac woke up the next morning to go to work he noticed it pretty quickly and immedietly came in to ask me why it was open. To this I became defensive (it was an honest mistake!) and sad. But take a step back, why was he mad? It was because he is concerned for our saftey.  Also knowing if I left it open was WAY different than thinking someone broke in.

When I took a step back and realized why he was mad, I was actually happy. He cares about us soo much that seeing a door unlocked would be a concern. On the flip side he could see my tears as a guilt tactic to get out of trouble, but that wasn’t it at all. I was sad that I had upset him, especally in such a silly way. It was so preventable.

So for a while now I’m going to work on a new routine at night. I’m going to have a list of things to check before going to be. It feels silly and I think I don’t need it but I’ve proven that wrong one time to many. So I’m going to do something about it.

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