As I mentioned last week my Grandma (Mom’s Side) was in Hospice. Well since then we have lost her and this is the main reason I was MIA for a while. Podunk Iowa doesn’t have Internet…
My Grandma was one of the toughest ladies I know, she hated to talk about it but when my mom was just an infant her dad (Grandma’s Husband) left. Left her alone with a baby and a 7 year old…. But she was strong and stubborn and persisted and then when my Mom was 2 (or so I remember) she married my Grandpa. He is the sweetest most caring guy you will every meet.
Grandma had her own beauty salon out in the farmhouse, while running the house (cooking cleaning, bills.) Then she moved her shop in town and had a beauty and gift shop. At one point she decided that she wanted to do flowers, so she signed up for a class in a town 2 hours away drove herself there and took the class. From then on, and what I remember the best, was her flower and gift store.
I remember ‘helping’ her make arrangements. Once in a while she would let me design a small arrangement on my own and put it in the cooler to sell. Remarkably they always did, looking back I wonder if she bought them when I wasn’t looking. She would let me run the cash register and make sure I knew how to count back change. I remember crafts with her on the farm and riding in the back of her flower delivery van with my cousins to go to the Omaha Zoo.
When Mark and I got married she did our flowers as our gift, it is still one of my favorite parts of the wedding. When Mac and I got married her memory was starting to fail and we didn’t know it at the time but that was the beginning of Alzheimer’s. Mac could see her stubbornness in how she ‘introduced herself’ when she thought I had forgotten to introduce him. He couldn’t see how amazing that was when she could apply it to life. He knows she was a great cook from the meals we prepare at her house with her recipes, but he has never had her cooking. That all makes me sad. But what makes me even more sad is that my children will never meet her.
I know that sounds selfish, but I don’t mean it to be. I just want them to meet the Grandma that I had such a great time with growing up.
December 22nd we lost Grandma to her fight. It was hard but it was time. To be honest it was harder for me to watch my Mom go through it. I watched her be so tough and just willed her to let down her guard and be sad for a bit. She was allowed after all she just lost her Mom.
What wonderful memories you will always have and can share with your children.
So often , in my mothers failing years, I wished that my family could have known her when she was a vibrant, talented force. But, memories do survive and we can treasure them. Best wishes.
Oh Amber, I’m so sorry for your and your family’s loss this holiday season. I love my grandmother too which is why I am glad she is still doing well at her old age and why I make sure that E gets to see her often whenever we on our annual trip home. She might not remember my grandma at her young age but at least my grandma has good memories of spending time with her.
I felt the same sense of loss you felt when my maternal grandfather passed away 10 years ago. I also wish that both Jason, E and the next baby could have met him when he was alive because my grandfather was an amazing person.
Just know that your grandmother loved you very much and passed her legacy down to you. As long as you remember the things you learned from her and share your memories of her with your kids and with Mac, you are keeping her alive in their hearts.