So Ryan and I are going through pre-marital counseling and it has been great! Part of what we are doing is reading through a book called “Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts: Seven Questions to Ask Before and After You Marry” By Les and Leslie Parrott. One of the chapters was talking about blame and how not only can we not blame our parents for everything that is wrong with us, we also have to take responsibility for our emotions. I admit this has been a struggle for me in two very different ways.
First of all when I was younger I couldn’t control them very well at all, I was all over the place. Up and down happy then sad you never knew what was going to set me off. Then I became too controlling (except a few choice times.) I was pretty flat and honestly as time went on I stopped enjoying parts of life that take emotion to truly appreciate. So where does that leave me now? CONFUSED. Very confused.
I’ve had a lot going on lately good and bad and my brain can’t seem to figure out how to handle it, some days I’m over the top other days in perfect control where is the balance? I need to take control of my emotions again not in the overbearing no emotion way but in the I’m allowed to react to things but life isn’t going to end.
This applies to everyone here, when some one is mean, rude, spiteful or just plane inconsiderate we do have the ability to choose how we react. I’m not saying we don’t have the right to be offended or to react at all I’m saying we don’t have to let these things ruin our whole day necessarily. Face it some things are going to ruin a day (death for example) but other things don’t have to. Maybe your spouse is tired and says something without thinking, you do have the right to be upset but don’t let it ruin your day. This is an active choice and not an easy one. It’s something I’ve been working on and seen some success. I hope to see more soon after some of the good stresses are done (wedding.)